Consistency is the playground of dull minds.

I am feeling total; bleh.

I have good days, great days even, and I have bad days, but overall…bleh!

Now the sun is finally out, I am starting to feel more myself. I've even started going out more again, which is slowly bring my motivation back to life.

As you know, I love wacky weather, but we all need a bit of vitamin D every now and then to keep us going.

I had my first jabby jab the other week, and while my arm ached to hell, I felt alright. About lunchtime, the following day, I did feel a bit wobbly though. I am not sure if that was just because everybody was expecting me too, and basically telling me to go home and rest. Do not get me wrong, I was shocked too. My body doesn't usually give me the best track record of being kind, but for once; it had my back.

Now, I know there are very mixed opinions on the whole vaccination situation, and I am sure we all have strong arguments to fight on both sides. But just know, I am happy with my decision to have it, and as long as your happy with yours, it is all good.

Upside, if the rumours are true, and I do ever go missing. Make sure they activate my chip and come find me, please.

Guess what? I adventured out for the first time in nearly a year the other Saturday, and what a much-needed night that was. I also had a remarkably busy weekend this Bank Holiday. Spend two days in MK. That was also needed, but my bank balance wasn't as grateful.

I brought too many random, unneeded things. I did however eat the best burger of my life! Thank you, Brewhouse and kitchen; is anyone loving the whole order from your phone to come to your table shit, because I totally am! No waiting for others to order, no splitting the bills. Order, pay, eat, go. Perfect.

I’m also heading to MK again tonight! We’re going to watch The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It at Nightflix Drive-in Cinema, and I can’t wait! Going to get my snacks on and watch some scary.

I've also come to the conclusion I have the worst luck in the world too - because not only did I break my glasses last weekend, but the other night my car battery died. My fault, I left my car lights on for about four hours - which just shows what a complete fucking idiot I am. I mean, I have a warning buzzer and everything! So, my car screamed at me when this happened, and I just decided to ignore it that night.

There I was chilling, enjoying my evening after a wonderful bath and then Karl and Steph shout to me, "umm Sharon isn’t that your car?" That would be a yes - oh for fuck’s sake

So, a pure panic moment later, as none of my immediate friends come to mind who drive - or they do- - but they only drive a company van, which is still at work, Ryan! Then the beautiful and the amazing Charmaine suddenly popped in my brain, a quick ‘help me’ message later and she comes on over, jump leads in hand - just to draw a picture of the night - it was about 9pm at this point.

Both wrapped up in our jammies, slippers and all, we quickly come to the realisation we didn't have a fucking clue what we were doing, so we had to call in even more help.

You see, my battery is located in a weird place, at the back of the car, but in sidewards. I could not work out how to reach the negative part of it; without pulling bits of the car apart to sort it – because the manual made no sense, and the internet was letting us down.

So, Ryan biked over to support us, 10am has rolled around.

Within minutes, plastic began to break, and screws, and bits of metal flew around us as we started to pull the engine apart.

Can you already see how horribly wrong it’s going, because what the fuck, do we know about cars!

About halfway through us doing this, Karl and Steph came to join in - it is about 11pm at this point.

Karl rubs his chin and could already see what a fucking mess we were making.

We all took a step back and realised that actually there was a different way to charge my car - thanks to some re-reading of the manual and lots, and lots of google searching and watching of videos.

Turns out the negative has its own little nob at the side of it - well can we have some clearer instructions, please.

11:30pm has arrived, and we quickly put the car back together. A few missing parts, but hell it looks alright. Who cares about these random bits of car in my hand?

Karl and Ryan plugged the leads in - which turns out, we can still do this simple part wrong too.

Karl and Ryan took another look at it, googled again, with a slight shock to the system on Ryan’s part. We finally got the car started at 11:45pm, leads in the right place to give it the kick start it needed

I thanked Charmaine for her 3 hours stay in the cold and did a quick drive to McDonald's for a drink and some small chips, using the excuse to keep my car running of course.

When I finally got back at 12:45am - I sat in the car just a little longer, before I had the guts to switch off the engine. I restarted and it was fine, waited a bit more, restarted again, and boom it seemed to be living its best life

01:35 I am finally in bed, about to start my restless sleep, due to being way too buzzed from the evening!

I mean, what is my life. I just can't! Why do I have so much bad luck with cars!? (ha)

We laugh about it now - tell a lie - we laughed about it the whole time, because my friends are awesome, and what’s the point of having an easy life, right?! Right?

It is in these moments I love though because it shows I really have picked the right group of people and every day I wonder what I would have done without them.

Just to add some recent clarification brought to my attention; I don't regret anything I write.

I believe it, I feel it. My opinions might change, but regret; hell fucking no.

I grow and I am okay showing that growth.

Why do I do this? Because I fucking want to.

I share only what I want, I don't direct anything at anybody - but hey, if the shoe fits, fucking wear it and walk on by.

You don't have to be here. If it hurts your feelings, you do not have to read any of it.

I am not obsessed with the "following"

I do not need a million people to make me feel special, I am already fucking awesome thank you very much.

I stop worrying about people judging me a long time ago. It took me a while, but I realised that those who feel the need to do so, are just sad and lonely, and just not happy with their lives.

I do not mean this in some, bitchy, love yourself quote way.

It is psychologically true!

For us human beings, this is what we do, and we ALL do it. Denying it is ridiculous.

Our brains are set to default to bitch, gossip and moan when we are sad. It has become an evolutional state. (If you haven't read Sapiens: A Brief History of Humankind by Yuval Noah Harari, check it the fuck out!)

But that is my point; You need to have a good fucking look at yourself; work out what the fuck you want and go out and get it.

Stop being a mug to life. Change the habits. Evolve better.

Stop being the "yes" and "I’m a lad" girl, who thinks their opinions need to match that of a fucking guy they like.

Stop being the "big" guy, the one who thinks he must treat others with disrespect because it makes them look cool.

Just get off your arse and go find what makes you happy.

Because, taking the piss out of others might entertain you for a while, but it is only going to darken your mind and your heart. And that is not fucking healthy, is it!

You will not change tomorrow, these habits are hard to break, but one moment at a time and you'll get there in the end.

We all bitch, we all moan in the moment, but if you’re having to go out of your way to find drama, just stop and start being thankful for the life you are living.

You've got this!

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